The C-Section at 36 Weeks

5:15am heading for the hospital

6:00am ready for all the prep

We arrived at the hospital at 5:30am and had quite a chipper nurse which would have been awesome, but not so much at that early hour, I wasn't in the mood and didn't sleep at all the previous night. I was hoping to be poked only once for my IV since they are painful and I hate them but that didn't happen despite my attempts at being as hydrated as possible with Sir Lancelot as my water sergeant. Walking into the OR was weird, I thought I'd be wheeled in there but I had to pause at the door for a moment. That's when I became scared. Bright lights, doctors and nurses in scrubs standing and waiting for their patient, lots of machinery, lots of tools laid out in perfect rows, sterile everything. It kinda freaked me out and reality hit that I was about to have surgery. I sat up on the table and had to be poked a few times for the numbing medicine before the actual spinal block. That wasn't very pleasant and I was sad Lance wasn't in the room because I had two good zingers and he missed them both. I guess my joking was my own little way of dealing with the fear.

After that everything happened really fast but not fast enough to avoid the nausea and throwing up. Next thing I knew they were cutting into me and Lance was nowhere to be seen. I asked the nurse, where's Lance? She said she didn't know. Ten seconds pass by, where's Lance? She said he disappeared. Ten more seconds pass, where's Lance? She said she didn't know and that he had disappeared. I asked 20 times too many where Lance was and nobody seemed to know. I could feel the tugging and pulling and knew the baby was coming soon. Finally Lance walked in right as they pulled the baby out which he was quite happy about until he came to the other side of the drape where I was bawling. I was red faced, tear smeared, one heck of a hot mess. I was livid! My only source of comfort wasn't there when I needed him and no nurse would go find him. When he finally did show up he kept asking me why I was crying and what was wrong. The only thing I could say was everything, because it didn't matter at that time if he was there, my security blanket was gone and all the fear and anxiety and unknown seeped into my whole being. So for the remainder of the stitching up I bawled and bawled and nothing could settle me down.

Then the shakes started which I had read about but forgotten and it freaked out Lance. I got wheeled into the recovery room when I demanded from Lance what in the world happened and why he wasn't there. Turns out Lance was all dressed in scrubs ready to go, waited for 20 minutes and nobody called him in yet (this was the time the anesthesiologist poked me several times because it took him a few times to get it) and natures calls. He went to the restroom and was there for about a minute and a half. Nobody went to look for him, he walked in the OR just in time to see the doctor pull out the baby. Lance felt terribly guilty. I was so upset and still so livid, I just kept crying all through the recovery room and into the postpartum room. I wasn't mad at Lance, just the nurses. Why didn't anybody get him???

At this point I had been awake for 2 days so I was like a zombie who just underwent surgery. I tried to sleep but to no avail. I finally had the chance to see Kimball in the NICU and it was great for us to be a family of three for the first time. After visitors left and Lance went home home to sleep, I finally drifted off into a slumber. Of course I had to wake up several times for vitals and blood draws and the like but I was so relieved to sleep.