Enlightened Yet Scattered Thoughts

Today we had ward conference and for the first part of sacrament meeting, Kimball was quite good. The last half he wasn't fussy but his usual jabberings were too loud and Lance took him out so I could stay in the chapel and listen. We just got a new bishopric last week and I can't even imagine the pressure and whirlwind and overwhelming-ness of that kind of calling. Not to mention speaking in ward conference right after he was sustained. I wish I could have recorded his entire talk, it was just so good. And though my thoughts are scattered, this is my attempt to organize them so I can be a better wife and mother.

• I'm impressed with the bishop and his sharing a little bit about his marriage. How often they pray or read the scriptures, how they express their gratitude to one another. And while this may come across as bragging, it certainly didn't to me. I was very impressed that he was open and I was certainly overcome with the sense that I'm a terrible wife! I'm pretty sure I call Lance an idiot at least 20 times a day (mostly out of sarcasm), I more often than not forget to pack his lunch so he starves all day at work, I don't get his laundry done when he needs it, I don't greet him at the door with a kiss because I'm usually taking care of Kimball, and on and on. I know the bishop wasn't trying to make us feel inadequate by sharing a few things about his marriage. I just want to work harder and be a better wife for Lance. Lance doesn't complain at all but I should just.......I don't know what I'm trying to say......I just want to do more things for him to make him happy. Simply for that purpose. I want to do something little everyday that will make him smile and want to come home to me.
• I don't know how many times the  bishop's wife had to get up and down and in and out of the chapel today to chase their youngest child. I just remember thinking, "Man, if I were her, I'd be in tears having a meltdown and trying to go home as fast as I can." But she kept at it and kept her composure and it didn't seem to ruin her sunday at all. I talked to her for a bit after church to thank her for showing that motherhood is a bit challenging at times and with her young family of five kids, if she can do it then so can I. She then told me a few more stories about how some of her children had embarrassed her earlier in the week and I just thanked her for sharing. Because if a bishop's wife can have a difficult sunday and be ok with it then so can I. I don't know why but sundays are my hardest days of the week. (With Kimball that is).
• Our ward has so many young families and other women who have their hands free are more than willing to help mothers like me. Today was one of those days, I was fortunate to see Terri Swensen since she was there for ward conference and she took Kimball for me so I could go to Relief Society. Thank you to all the women who help mothers!
• There was also a big emphasis on regular temple attendance. Oh boy, I have slacked big time in this area. Sadly, this past year I haven't gone a whole lot. It was definitely a huge adjustment for me to become a mother and with all the change and such, the months just crept away. I think I'm going to make it a "me night" where Lance can stay home with Kimball and I can go to the temple by myself (and perhaps stop for ice cream). Of course we'll go together as well. It's pretty pathetic if I compare our temple attendance in Charleston to now. The drive from Chas to Columbia was two hours and we were ordinance workers every other week. But now? I'm so pathetic! Anyway, so I definitely need to make a commitment to go more regularly to the temple, it's only 10 minutes away after all.
• I'm having a hard time remembering everything else that was talked about, I just really wanted to remember how the bishop spoke about his wife with such loving sincerity. I wanted to remember my chat with his wife about being a mother and her encouragement and loving support. I just need to be a better wife with less use of the word idiot and a more patient mother to my sweet boy.