Handling Life Lately

This week I am six weeks postpartum and finally starting to feel a bit normal. My incision and abdominal muscles are still sore and I have a bit of pelvic floor pain still, but overall I feel more human. This recovery was a doozy and I knew it would take me the full six weeks AND more to fully recover. I'm still trying to figure out how to juggle all three kids - the dishes are always piled up, laundry is never done, the bills and bank accounts aren't paid or reconciled, the weeds are HUGE and spreading, I barely have time to shower, I'm always late, and I've got big bags and dark circles under my eyes. I'm just plain tired!! Every day I remind myself that the newborn stage passes so quickly and to enjoy it, even in the wee hours of the morning when I'm up with Ezra. I try to remind myself that the dust and dirt will always be there but I won't always have a 3 and 5 year old who want to play. Kimball is going to be in Kindergarten so these summer months are the last months I'll get to be his main influence and that is scary. I never have a minute to myself unless I sacrifice my nap (which is what I chose to do so I could write in this journal today) so my cup of giving is usually empty rather than full. I give all I can throughout the day to my children while longing for just 30 minutes to myself. And then I have to pause and remember that they will never be this little again.......and then I usually cry of exhaustion and eat some chocolate.Gah!
Ezra is such a good baby, he's a champion eater and is already eating 6 ounces at just 6 weeks old! The last two weeks however he's become a projectile vomitter. His distance is that of Olympic proportions and the volume reminds me a lot of Cora - so much spit up! I've been getting frustrated and discouraged because it creates SO MUCH laundry and baths and messes. His pediatrician just switched him over to Similac For Spit Up to see if that will help and if not then we'll try some reflux medicine. I'm really hoping for either of those to work because the alternative would be the same stomach surgery that Cora had and I really, REALLY don't want to go through all that again.

Things I love about newborns:

• skinny legs with loose skin waiting to be filled with fat
• unbelievable amount of sneezes
• tired sighs and squeaky breathing
• fresh, newborn smell
• how they roll up into a ball 
• can sleep anywhere
• so squishy 
• velvety hair
• so much sweetness in such a tiny body