Living in the Moment

I've off and on entertained the idea of starting our family this past year, feeling so excited and anxious to have a baby and feeling exhaustion and a "what did I get myself into" thought all at the same time. I've come upon the conclusion to be happy with my life and to live in the moment and in the here and now. I think so many times as a society, we see other people and are envious of what they are or of what they have. But like I said, I've come to be happy and content with my life and to live in the moment. I remember a talk given by Elder Ballard this year, as he quoted:

Author Anna Quindlen reminds us not to rush past the fleeting moments. She said: “The biggest mistake I made [as a parent] is the one that most of us make. … I did not live in the moment enough. This is particularly clear now that the moment is gone, captured only in photographs. There is one picture of [my three children] sitting in the grass on a quilt in the shadow of the swing set on a summer day, ages six, four, and one. And I wish I could remember what we ate, and what we talked about, and how they sounded, and how they looked when they slept that night. I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get on to the next thing: dinner, bath, book, bed. I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less” (Loud and Clear [2004], 10–11).

I really appreciate this and though I'm not speaking just to mothers, that aspect of life has been on my mind lately. I've come to really appreciate the time I have with my husband. We've been married 3.5 years, the recent 2.5 we've been in Charleston. I'm so thankful for the time we've had to be away from family, it has made us rely and depend so much on each other and grow inseparable. I'm grateful that even though we don't have kids yet, if we want to go to the beach at midnight, we can simply put our swim suits on and leave without further preparation. I'm grateful for the one-on-one time. I think I'm a little selfish in this regard, when a baby comes along I'll have to share Lance and that will be an adjustment for me.

My good friend Crystal has a poem that has also had a profound impact on me that she keeps on her fridge:

"Cleaning and scrubbing can wait till tomorrow,

for babies grow up I've learned to my sorrow.

So quiet down cob webs and dust go to sleep.

I'm rocking my baby and babies don't keep."

I encourage you young mothers not to worry so much about the spills and stains and the things kids don't do quite right. I encourage you to find joy and happiness and fulfillment in each moment. Even the moments that are a little frustrating and upsetting, there's always something to learn and laugh at. If you long to have kids (like me), if you've had all you can handle with your kids, if your kids are teenagers or out of the house; treasure each moment for those moments will pass and you'll never regain time. For now, I'm happy and content to live with my best friend, to be married to a man who treats me like a queen. We have this small window of time to be adventurous and spontaneous without having to find a babysitter. I love this time together, just Lance and I. I'm treasuring it because never in our lives will it ever be like this. Our lives will become more rich and full as we have kids and grand kids, but for now while he is all I know, my life is richly blessed. (In case you are wondering, no this is not my attempt to announce that we're expecting).