Sunday, October 6, 2019

Emily Elizabeth

Chris was one of my first friends in Spokane, she was pregnant with Sydney the same time I was with Cora. Fast forward. Last year she finally became pregnant with her second daughter but doctors soon realized that something wasn't quite right. Lots of tests and ultrasounds and various imaging and poking resulted in the news that baby Emily had Trisomy 18 and will not survive past 30 weeks gestation.

Chris is a thorough planner and as 30 weeks approached she was shocked to still be pregnant and so grateful, knowing it was a miracle. She had back up plans with Lance in case anything sudden were to happen to the baby. Christmas came and Chris traveled home, Spring came, and then eventually Chris' due date. She was still pregnant! She soon became over due and the doctors decided to induce labor at 41 weeks.

As soon as Emily was born, the nurses put her on a towel on Chris' chest for skin-to-skin. No crying. No movement from Emily. No sign of life. It was assumed that the baby would be still born and would need immediate care so there was a large team to meet any scenario. Chris kept talking to Emily and rubbing her back. She was frustrated by the towel and asked the nurses to remove it so that Emily could lay directly on her. More talking and rubbing her back and after what seemed like an eternity, the most beautiful newborn baby cry. Emily was alive!

Emily was checked out by all involved and what an incredible result - she was eating and breathing all on her own. This baby has defied all odds! The few deformities were checked out and addressed, starting with therapy for the club foot, a feeding tube was eventually placed, and Chris started a similar journey to my own of caring for a special needs baby.

About a week shy of turning 2 months old, Emily caught a cold that landed her in the hospital in the PICU. She was struggling on her own to breathe. She was in the hospital for about a week when Chris and Seth had to say good bye to their precious miracle. As Lance got the call, he told me I should come but I wasn't sure if I could, emotionally, since this has hit so close to home. But I went anyway.

We visited in the hospital for an hour as Chris held Emily still with her tiny hand wrapped around her thumb. We all cried. We all knew it was the Lord's will that Emily be called home but it was still such a sorrowful moment. When Chris was ready we all hugged and said good bye and the hardest thing I've ever had to do was take an infant from the arms of a grieving mother, especially one of my good friends. Chris chose to have her cremated so this was the last time she'd ever see or hold her baby again. I sobbed all the way back to the call car, I sobbed all the way to the funeral home, I said my own tender good bye as I placed her in the cooler.

The funeral service was beautiful and packed full of people, they have a very supportive ward. I wanted to remember this touching experience because although it was sad, it was also so very sacred. I am so grateful to be there in the hospital that night, to be the one to take Emily. We all have Emily shirts and wear them proudly and I've kept some of the butterflies from the funeral.

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