Can't Sleep

It's 2:38 am and I can't sleep. Bah! I'm supposed to go with Mom and Trish to UT tomorrow to visit Christine which I'm excited about. She's been working really hard on their new house and I can't wait to see all the updates in person! We're going down to the Swiss Days, apparently it's a really fantastic craft fair thingy that's really popular. It's actually good timing because for the rest of the week, after Lance gets home from work he'll change clothes and go straight to the fair for quartet singing which means it'll be Kimball and I without him all weekend anyway.

Kimball is so funny, I love that boy. He's tip toeing around the furniture and is the perfect height to bang on the tv with his hands and play with the Wii sensory bar thingymajig. Silly boy. He now refuses pureed/mashed up foods and only eats chopped foods which is nice that his formula bill has decreased significantly. He LOVES his daddy, that's for sure! Occasionally Lance will come home on his lunch break and as soon as he walks back out the door, Kimball follows him and then cries when the front door shuts. Lance doesn't think Kimball particularly cares or knows when he's home, but Kimball definitely does.

Remember that procrastination blog post I read that inspired me? Obviously I need to read it again because I still haven't started the painting. Not even the prep work which is most of the battle when it comes to painting.

Lance has been working on putting in a cement patio by the back door. Kimball stands at the french doors and just watches him work while I sit on the couch eating my "double twist cone in a cup with two extra scoops of sprinkles" from Arctic Circle.

There's a show on Netflix called Solved. I'm totally addicted. As in I may or may not have but definitely did watch 3 or 4 episodes today. Today alone. Today alone with my sprinkled ice cream.

A few weeks ago out of the blue Lance says in his most annoying british accent, "I got a twinkle in me eye and a shine on me shoe!" Probably one of those you-had-to-be-there kind of moments but it was absolutely hilarious and I still laugh out loud whenever I think about it. How does he come up with these things? Ok! I'm still laughing out loud even as I type. Dumb! But funny.

Right now I just want to sleep....

Stuck Again

This increasingly independent little boy loves to play in the bathroom. Which I don't like. At all. So unless I'm in there getting ready for the day, we always close the door. Today he ventured all the way around the claw foot tub and got stuck. (Yeah, I know we need to paint the trim and such in this room. Around the claw foot tub is an incredibly tight space, obviously since even Kimball got stuck, so we may never paint in that area).

 Yep, I'm the kind of mom who snaps pictures even when the baby is so distraught he lays his head on the floor and cries. Hey, it's all in the name of journaling. :)

My Lovey

Procrastination

Are you a to-do list, checklist, honey do list, etc. kind of person? Me to! In fact, each night while I'm laying in bed chatting with Lance I get out my phone and write my to do list for the next day on my notebook thingy. My abbreviated list usually includes: shower, laundry, clean bathrooms, dinner, baby proof, paint, sub, porch, lesson, etc. (Lance thinks it's so pathetic that I have to pencil in "shower." Indeed, it is pathetic and I hate doing it. Showering is the worst chore of all, I'd rather do dishes or vacuum or clean the bathrooms. But if I don't put it on the list, it doesn't get done).

While I've been browsing pinterest and blogs of all sorts today, I came across this post: Anti Procrastination: Do What You Can and became inspired. Basically, she says to stop procrastinating and just do it. Because as mothers/women we wait for the perfect time to get a particular something done. For me, it's painting. I bought paint several months ago to paint ALL of the trim work in our house. I haven't done it because I need all the trim work to be vacuumed and scrubbed clean before I paint. Well, I don't want to scrub or vacuum those baseboards, I'd rather blog. :)  Anyway, so I'm just going to get it done because it's been on my to-do list on my phone for forever and I can't wait to check it off. So, if you're like me, read the above post and be inspired to just get things done...........one step at a time.

Homemade Baby Toys

I've found some pretty awesome blogs/sites for homemade baby toys and thought I'd share. My favorite is a texture book and tickle sticks which I can't wait to make!

Make Do And Friend
Bloesem Kids
Imperfect Homemaker

Because She Is A Mother

(This talk was just too good. I needed to post it. It's by Jeffrey R. Holland April 1997).

There are some lines attributed to Victor Hugo which read:

“She broke the bread into two fragments and gave them to her children, who ate with eagerness. ‘She hath kept none for herself,’ grumbled the sergeant.

“‘Because she is not hungry,’ said a soldier.

“‘No,’ said the sergeant, ‘because she is a mother.’”

In a year when we are celebrating the faith and valor of those who made that exacting trek across Iowa, Nebraska, and Wyoming, I wish to pay tribute to the modern counterparts of those pioneer mothers who watched after, prayed for, and far too often buried their babies on that long trail. To the women within the sound of my voice who dearly want to be mothers and are not, I say through your tears and ours on that subject, God will yet, in days that lie somewhere ahead, bring “hope to [the] desolate heart.” ¹ As prophets have repeatedly taught from this pulpit, ultimately “no blessing shall be withheld” from the faithful, even if those blessings do not come immediately. ² In the meantime we rejoice that the call to nurture is not limited to our own flesh and blood.

In speaking of mothers I do not neglect the crucial, urgent role of fathers, particularly as fatherlessness in contemporary homes is considered by some to be “the central social problem of our time.” ³ Indeed, fatherlessness can be a problem even in a home where the father is present—eating and sleeping, so to speak, “by remote.” But that is a priesthood message for another day. Today I wish to praise those motherly hands that have rocked the infant’s cradle and, through the righteousness taught to their children there, are at the very center of the Lord’s purposes for us in mortality.

In so speaking I echo Paul, who wrote in praise of Timothy’s “unfeigned faith … , which dwelt first,” he said, “in thy grandmother Lois, and [in] thy mother Eunice.” ⁴ “From [the days when thou wert] a child,” Paul said, “thou hast known the holy scriptures.” ⁵ We give thanks for all the mothers and grandmothers from whom such truths have been learned at such early ages.

In speaking of mothers generally, I especially wish to praise and encourage young mothers. The work of a mother is hard, too often unheralded work. The young years are often those when either husband or wife—or both—may still be in school or in those earliest and leanest stages of developing the husband’s breadwinning capacities. Finances fluctuate daily between low and nonexistent. The apartment is usually decorated in one of two smart designs—Deseret Industries provincial or early Mother Hubbard. The car, if there is one, runs on smooth tires and an empty tank. But with night feedings and night teethings, often the greatest challenge of all for a young mother is simply fatigue. Through these years, mothers go longer on less sleep and give more to others with less personal renewal for themselves than any other group I know at any other time in life. It is not surprising when the shadows under their eyes sometimes vaguely resemble the state of Rhode Island.

Of course the irony is that this is often the sister we want to call—or need to call—to service in the ward and stake auxiliaries. That’s understandable. Who wouldn’t want the exemplary influence of these young Loises- and Eunices-in-the-making? Everyone, be wise. Remember that families are the highest priority of all, especially in those formative years. Even so, young mothers will still find magnificent ways to serve faithfully in the Church, even as others serve and strengthen them and their families in like manner.

Do the best you can through these years, but whatever else you do, cherish that role that is so uniquely yours and for which heaven itself sends angels to watch over you and your little ones. Husbands—especially husbands—as well as Church leaders and friends in every direction, be helpful and sensitive and wise. Remember, “To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven.” ⁶
 

Mothers, we acknowledge and esteem your faith in every footstep. Please know that it is worth it then, now, and forever. And if, for whatever reason, you are making this courageous effort alone, without your husband at your side, then our prayers will be all the greater for you, and our determination to lend a helping hand even more resolute.

One young mother wrote to me recently that her anxiety tended to come on three fronts. One was that whenever she heard talks on LDS motherhood, she worried because she felt she didn’t measure up or somehow wasn’t going to be equal to the task. Secondly, she felt like the world expected her to teach her children reading, writing, interior design, Latin, calculus, and the Internet—all before the baby said something terribly ordinary, like “goo goo.” Thirdly, she often felt people were sometimes patronizing, almost always without meaning to be, because the advice she got or even the compliments she received seemed to reflect nothing of the mental investment, the spiritual and emotional exertion, the long-night, long-day, stretched-to-the-limit demands that sometimes are required in trying to be and wanting to be the mother God hopes she will be.

But one thing, she said, keeps her going: “Through the thick and the thin of this, and through the occasional tears of it all, I know deep down inside I am doing God’s work. I know that in my motherhood I am in an eternal partnership with Him. I am deeply moved that God finds His ultimate purpose and meaning in being a parent, even if some of His children make Him weep.

“It is this realization,” she says, “that I try to recall on those inevitably difficult days when all of this can be a bit overwhelming. Maybe it is precisely our inability and anxiousness that urge us to reach out to Him and enhance His ability to reach back to us. Maybe He secretly hopes we will be anxious,” she said, “and will plead for His help. Then, I believe, He can teach these children directly, through us, but with no resistance offered. I like that idea,” she concludes. “It gives me hope. If I can be right before my Father in Heaven, perhaps His guidance to our children can be unimpeded. Maybe then it can be His work and His glory in a very literal sense.” ⁷
 

In light of that kind of expression, it is clear that some of those Rhode Island–sized shadows come not just from diapers and carpooling but from at least a few sleepless nights spent searching the soul, seeking earnestly for the capacity to raise these children to be what God wants them to be. Moved by that kind of devotion and determination, may I say to mothers collectively, in the name of the Lord, you are magnificent. You are doing terrifically well. The very fact that you have been given such a responsibility is everlasting evidence of the trust your Father in Heaven has in you. He knows that your giving birth to a child does not immediately propel you into the circle of the omniscient. If you and your husband will strive to love God and live the gospel yourselves; if you will plead for that guidance and comfort of the Holy Spirit promised to the faithful; if you will go to the temple to both make and claim the promises of the most sacred covenants a woman or man can make in this world; if you will show others, including your children, the same caring, compassionate, forgiving heart you want heaven to show you; if you try your best to be the best parent you can be, you will have done all that a human being can do and all that God expects you to do.

Sometimes the decision of a child or a grandchild will break your heart. Sometimes expectations won’t immediately be met. Every mother and father worries about that. Even that beloved and wonderfully successful parent President Joseph F. Smith pled, “Oh! God, let me not lose my own.” ⁸ That is every parent’s cry, and in it is something of every parent’s fear. But no one has failed who keeps trying and keeps praying. You have every right to receive encouragement and to know in the end your children will call your name blessed, just like those generations of foremothers before you who hoped your same hopes and felt your same fears.

Yours is the grand tradition of Eve, the mother of all the human family, the one who understood that she and Adam had to fall in order that “men [and women] might be” ⁹ and that there would be joy. Yours is the grand tradition of Sarah and Rebekah and Rachel, without whom there could not have been those magnificent patriarchal promises to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob which bless us all. Yours is the grand tradition of Lois and Eunice and the mothers of the 2,000 stripling warriors. Yours is the grand tradition of Mary, chosen and foreordained from before this world was, to conceive, carry, and bear the Son of God Himself. We thank all of you, including our own mothers, and tell you there is nothing more important in this world than participating so directly in the work and glory of God, in bringing to pass the mortality and earthly life of His daughters and sons, so that immortality and eternal life can come in those celestial realms on high.

When you have come to the Lord in meekness and lowliness of heart and, as one mother said, “pounded on the doors of heaven to ask for, to plead for, to demand guidance and wisdom and help for this wondrous task,” that door is thrown open to provide you the influence and the help of all eternity. Claim the promises of the Savior of the world. Ask for the healing balm of the Atonement for whatever may be troubling you or your children. Know that in faith things will be made right in spite of you, or more correctly, because of you.

You can’t possibly do this alone, but you do have help. The Master of Heaven and Earth is there to bless you—He who resolutely goes after the lost sheep, sweeps thoroughly to find the lost coin, waits everlastingly for the return of the prodigal son. Yours is the work of salvation, and therefore you will be magnified, compensated, made more than you are and better than you have ever been as you try to make honest effort, however feeble you may sometimes feel that to be.

Remember, remember all the days of your motherhood: “Ye have not come thus far save it were by the word of Christ with unshaken faith in him, relying wholly upon the merits of him who is mighty to save.” ¹⁰

Rely on Him. Rely on Him heavily. Rely on Him forever. And “press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope.” ¹¹ You are doing God’s work. You are doing it wonderfully well. He is blessing you and He will bless you, even—no, especially—when your days and your nights may be the most challenging. Like the woman who anonymously, meekly, perhaps even with hesitation and some embarrassment, fought her way through the crowd just to touch the hem of the Master’s garment, so Christ will say to the women who worry and wonder and sometimes weep over their responsibility as mothers, “Daughter, be of good comfort; thy faith hath made thee whole.” ¹² And it will make your children whole as well.

Random Journaling About Church

• I have an amazing responsibility to raise my children not only as good citizens and neighbors who contribute to society but also as members of the church who continue to build God's kingdom. I know Kimball is a baby now and we start by teaching them when they're young. But in a world that's increasingly evil and dark, it's even more vital to teach these children. We had stake conference this weekend and the talks were so good, both the adult session and sunday session. It was so inspiring and I loved attending because it was a good renewal of dedication to the gospel. It was refreshing. The gospel equips us with the tools to teach our children correctly both as members of the church and as good people of a community. Doesn't the bible say that the second great commandment is to love thy neighbor as thyself? I don't think they teach that in schools and it's so important to me that my children be good people. It starts in the home and I have a huge responsibility as a mother to establish righteous patterns. 
•  Funny story I didn't know: one talk in stake conference was about reverence in sacrament meeting and what we can do to teach our children the importance and sacredness of the ordinance of the sacrament. One tip was to make sure that our sunday bags are full of toys that have zero possibility to make noise or enlighten our children's imagination so much that they make noise (such as trucks or airplanes for little boys. Trish even said that if her books are shaped liked a truck, her boys will soon be imitating one). An example the speaker gave was that in her ward a small child sneaked into church without their parent's knowledge a baby kitty. It must've been a reverent kitten because the parents had no idea until after sacrament meeting that the child sneaked it in. Yeah, turns out that was Brad and Heather's little Aubrey! Heather said it was so hard to be mad at Aubrey because she was so clever and neither her nor Brad realized she brought it in until the very end of the meeting.
• These past two weeks I have learned that with Kimball's mobilization comes adaptation. He talks and he talks a lot and talks loudly. And he loves to move every part of him that can. I have learned that the best way to deal with his loud talking and ever moving body in church, is to adapt to him. Not the other way around.  I can't expect a 10 month old to sit still and be quiet for three hours nor can I expect him to know why he needs to do so. So I've learned to adapt to him. This keeps me much less frustrated and helps me enjoy my sundays more, having realized this.
• Channel 7.2 plays BYU tv on sundays and at 9:30 Music and the Spoken Word are on. I love listening to the music right before I leave for church, it sets the tone for the day really well.
• I have committed to doing my visiting teaching. I'm not good at it but I decided that since I ask my sunday school class to strive to keep the commandments and such, I don't want to be a hypocrite. But I am one if I don't do my visiting teaching. I got August already done and I'm committed to doing it. Because I have been asked to by the Lord and because I'm sure by doing so, the Lord will bless me.

Lance's Idea Of Watching Kimball

All Glory To His Name

“Jesus Christ lives. He is our Savior, our Redeemer. He is a glorious, resurrected being. He has the capacity to communicate love that is so powerful, so overwhelming as to surpass the capacity of the human tongue to express adequately. He gave His life to break the bonds of death. His Atonement made fully active the plan of happiness of His Father in Heaven.”

- Elder Richard G. Scott

Turning 27

Happy birthday to me. I am now 27 and I don't feel it at all, but when I hear the number it sounds old. For my birthday Lance let me have some me time which I've come to learn is quite priceless. I used that priceless time to go clothes shopping for myself since I just dumped out all the clothes that don't fit me which was 3/4 of my wardrobe. So with mom's company I went to the mall. Yeah, I definitely needed someone with me because with this post baby body, I don't know what fits and how things look so I always need an opinion. Along with shopping, I used my gift certificate from christmas to get an hour massage and paraffin dip. Awesome! Then Lance and I went on a date to the movies since the old Orpheum theater only charges $2. In all, a great day!

Lance and Donna went in together and bought/gave me Donna's old sewing machine. Yay!!! 

Lance gave me these two books. Look familiar? He published this blog! All five years to date, he got them published. I had to ask him a million questions about it because there are several websites which provide this service and they are expensive. He initially was going to use one of these but the price was near $300. Ouch! So he actually made them himself for a whopping $50. This picture doesn't show how thick the books are, but the first volume was 2007-2010 and the second volume to date. They are a good 1- 1.5" thick, the first book being 303 pages. They're big and heavy to say the least. And I love looking through them.

So, I know some of you have published your blogs: where did you get it done, how much was it, what's the quality of pictures, etc?

And with all of this being said, I LOVE BLOGGING!! I love that I can keep a journal with pictures. I love that I can write about the good and the bad because life isn't always peachy is it? I like to keep quotes and scriptures that sometimes aren't really applicable at the present moment, but I like to think that one day they will help me. I also like that family and friends across the country can check in and see what we're up to, especially since I'm not particularly fond of facebook. In short, if you don't journal or blog I think you should start because its a great way to sort through feelings and see the Lord's hand working in your life. The Lord is very mindful of us, that I have no doubt.

"Tonight, and tomorrow night, you might pray and ponder, asking the questions: Did God send a message that was just for me? Did I see His hand in my life or the lives of my children? I will do that. And then I will find a way to preserve that memory for the day that I, and those that I love, will need to remember how much God loves us and how much we need Him. I testify that He loves us and blesses us, more than most of us have yet recognized."

-President Henry B. Eyring 

Love My Job

Pool Day With Neighbors

 I love these three profile pictures because I can see so much of his newborn-ness.

Making Cookies With Mama

Fire In The Skies

Because of all the fires we've had this year we get some amazing sunsets and sunrises. Lots of orange and pink skies, but last week this is how the sun looked during the day. Oh, and our lovely jail parking lot as well.

Happy Guy

This little guy is always so happy when he wakes up from his naps. I can't remember why he wasn't wearing any clothes, I think I was going to bathe him after his nap.

Introducing

Baby Jayna was born yesterday via c-section at 8:16am weighing in at 5.4 lb. and 19" long. Congrats Scott and Jerusha, we are SO EXCITED for you!!

Playing With Daddy

Dogs and Feet

Whenever we visit Grandma and Grandpa Cox, Kimball goes for two things. The first is Baxter, he loves to tease the dog and get in his face and get him all riled up. The second is Grandpa's feet. I'm not sure what Grandpa's feet have to offer and I'm not going to find out for myself but whatever it is, Kimball loves them.

Discovery

Kimball discovered his little willy tonight while taking a bath. Oh boy..........pun intended......................

Do You Bling?

I had a bad today. Why? To be honest, I don't really know. It started out with Lance's alarm clock waking up Kimball so therefore I couldn't sleep in with him. Then as I was feeding him solids for breakfast he (Kimball, not Lance) decided to throw a fit. Sigh......fine. I give up. I'll just feed him a bottle instead of the recommended three feedings a day of solid foods. After I fed him I changed his diaper and he throws MAJOR fits when we change him. Why? I don't know! It would be over in 20 seconds and instead he squirms and fidgets and gets who knows what all over the floor. Then it was nap time which was my shower time. After I got ready for the day and Kimball woke up from his blissful nap, I fed him again and decided to choose my battles. So he got a bottle again. While he was eating, he pooed out of his pants.....and onto me.....that wasn't very funny. So I decided to drown my sorrows by shopping at the mall buying clothes for myself because I have accepted this body of mine won't look anywhere near Gabby Douglas'. (Insert blog story here) --->

***I saw a pin on pinterest about mom jeans and clicked the link to read all about it since I'm now a mom and wear jeans. Simultaneously in fact. It was SO hilarious and entertaining and also quite educational. So, having this new found knowledge about mom jeans, I tried to apply it while drowning my sorrows at the mall.***

I learned a few things at the mall:

#1. Jeans without some kind of bling on the pockets do not exist. I think I'm too old to wear jeans like that and right now they're what's in style. Why am I too old? I don't know. Should a 27 year old mother wear rhinestones on her bum? I just feel so......juvenile? Immature? I even mentioned that to the sales lady who was helping me and a few girls in the next dressing room corrected me, "No you're not! Even my mom wears jeans with the bling." But I distinctly remember shopping with Crystal A. in Charleston and I wanted to browse through Aeropostale. She remarked that she's too old to shop in that store and she was 29 at the time. So, when do you draw the line? At what age do you stop shopping at those kinds of stores? When do you stop shopping in the juniors and go to the misses? When do you stop shopping in the misses and go to the women's? I just don't know! Something about being a mom makes me feel old and like I should dress my age, I guess I don't see a 27 year old wearing rhinestones on the bum. They should be worn on a 12 or 13 year old. But I don't really know.

#2. Jeans are still so dang expensive! When I was a teenager you had to shop at The Buckle to buy jeans over $100. Yeah, those blinging jeans I just mentioned are upwards of $200 and can be found in any store. Who can afford that? I refuse to pay over $20 for a pair. I'm not cheap, I'm just trying to live within a budget and I don't need to fork out $180 more to make me look the exact same as if I forked over $20. I really don't care about designer labels.

#3. I always need to shop with someone. I need someone to be honest and tell me when things look awful and give me their opinion on how my bum looks in jeans or how my chest looks in a shirt. I don't want to look frumpy, disproportionate, ultra McHuge, or like a 13 year old. I remember shopping with Trish once after she had Peytin and she asked me how she looked in a particular shirt. I said, "Well, it'll look better when you're done nursing." Heather thinks I was being rude but I was just being honest and I would hope someone would tell me the same thing. A nursing bra and regular bra can give you two totally different looks! Not to mention the size difference as well.

So how did I do on my shopping trip? I bought a pair of bling jeans at DownEast Basics on clearance for $12 and another pair of regular jeans at Aeropostale on sale for 50% off which made them $20. I really don't know about either pair but the price was right and I'll probably end up taking them back in the end. I need to get someones opinion first.

Dear Grandma Lady At Winco

While frantically bagging my groceries this morning so as not to upset the long line behind me and keeping a nine month old baby entertained, you complimented me on my hair. I don't know why and I don't know who you are, I've never seen you before. But, thank you! It was such a nice comment out of the blue, it really made my day that you'd take a split second to say something nice to me. I am going remember you and the way you treated a young mother. I hope to pay it forward and only wish I had more time to chat with you about your life and wish you a good day. So, I bid you adieu and thank you for starting my week on a positive note.

Love, Me

Push Up Crawl No More

Last night while visiting Grandma Cox, Kimball had on his pajamas but it soon turned into a dress because when he'd try to do his push up crawl his legs would get caught. So we took his pajamas off so he could scoot around better. As soon as we did he started doing this mini drag-your-knees kind of crawl. It cracked me up!

Random Pictures From The Phone

This was at Jerusha's house - taking a bath the night before Aunt Kathy's funeral.

 This boy loves to pull himself up to things. His latest favorite places are the stairs and the fireplace.

This is how I found him Thursday morning. I tell you what, not only are we lucky parents because he's the cutest kid in the world; we're lucky because he always finds his pacifier first thing in the morning and will suck on it for who knows how long. Sometimes we don't even know he's awake. Example: about a month ago I got up early before anyone else was up so I could weed outside before it got hot and Lance was put in charge of Kimball. I finished up at 11:30 and found everyone was still asleep. At least Lance was, Kimball was in his crib just sucking on his pacifier laying there as content as could be.

 This was his first ice cream cone. Ok, not ice cream, just the cone. (I ate the ice cream).

What It Means (to me) To Be A Cox

I checked my email this afternoon and found one unread email from Lance. It was a forward entitled Poo Bread. Two thoughts came to mind, either this is going to be incredibly funny or I will end up saying OK! in the usual astonishing disgust. I opened it and saw the link was a recipe and video directions on making high fiber bread.

(quoting Kempton):

"So, this bread is super easy to make. It usually only takes me between 1 and 1.5 pieces to get things moving along. The key is that the bread is made with flax seed. One serving of flax seed meal has 49 carbs, 46 of which are fiber, haha. Enjoy. :)"

 

Thanks Kemp, our bathroom is your chore the next time you come for a visit.

Summer BBQ

Last night we were invited to a fun barbecue with a few neighbors around the block. We enjoyed some yummy hot dogs, watermelon, veggie kabobs, and played volleyball and badminton. It was really fun to connect with friends and the lighting was just too good, I had to snap a few pictures of Kimball. He played all night in the same spot in the grass.